We’ve all been hurt at one time or another through no fault of our own.

Our parents were cruel or negligent. A spouse was abusive or uncaring. We were bullied or mistreated at school or in social circles.

Most of us have experienced deep pain at some point in our lives.

It wasn’t fair. It wasn’t right.

We didn’t deserve it. We didn’t ask for it.

We’ve been hurt, angry, frustrated, devastated, confused, shocked, broken, and possibly even suicidal.

How could someone hurt us like that?

What did we do to them?

How am I going to get through this?

Will the pain ever go away?

It’s perfectly natural to blame the people who hurt us, they deserve the blame. Fair is fair. If someone’s hurt you, they deserve to be held accountable.

If you’re lucky, they might apologize or even try to make amends.

But many times we are left to suffer with our pain, alone.

We’re left to (try) and make sense of it.

We’re left to try and heal and move on.

Many of us get stuck blaming other’s and never progress any further.

Getting stuck is perfectly understandable, staying stuck is not.

We cannot control what someone else does. The people who hurt us, hurt us. We can’t stop them.

But we can choose to heal.

We can choose to pick ourselves up and move forward.

No one can make that choice for us. Of course there may be people who can help us heal, but the responsibility for healing falls directly on us.

Is that fair?

Probably not. After all, we didn’t do anything to deserve this pain.

But fair doesn’t matter, healing does, and it starts with us taking responsibility for ourselves, our lives, our emotions, and our actions.

It’s easy to stay stuck blaming other people, hoping they will apologize or acknowledge what they’ve done.

But until we accept responsibility for healing ourselves, we will never find peace.

Read books, find a counselor, talk to friends, watch YouTube videos, meditate, whatever you need to do.

But first accept responsibility for your own journey.

Once you do, the healing begins.